Andrew Lloyd Webber - Mungo Jerrie And Rumpleteazer Lyrics
The greatest magicians have something to learnFrom Mister Mistoffelees' Conjuring TurnMungojerrie and Rumpelteazer were a notorious couple of catsAs knockabout clowns, quick - change comediansTight - rope walkers and acrobatsThey had an extensive reputation, made their home in Victoria GroveThat was merely their center of operation for they were incurably given to roveIf the area window was found ajar and the basement looked like a field of warIf a tile or two came loose on the roof which presently ceased to be waterproofIf the drawers were pulled out from the bedroom chestsAnd you couldn't find one of your winter vestsOr after supper one of the girls suddenly missed her Woolworth pearlsThen the family would say, "It's that horrible cat!It was Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!"And most of the time they left it at thatMungojerrie and Rumpelteazer had an unusual gift of the gabThey were highly efficient cat burglars as well and remarkably smart at a smash and grabThey made their home in Victoria Grove, they had no regular occupationThey were plausible fellows who liked to engage a friendly policeman in conversationWhen the family assembled for Sunday dinnerTheir minds made up that they wouldn't get thinner onArgentine joint, potatoes and greensThen the cook would appear from behind the scenesAnd say in a voice that was broken with sorrow"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrowThe joint has gone from the oven like that!"Then the family would say, "It's that horrible cat!It was Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer!"And most of the time they left it at thatMungojerrie and Rumpelteazer had a wonderful way of working togetherAnd some of the time you would say it was luck and some of the time you would say it was weatherThey'd go through the house like a hurricane and no sober person could take his oathWas it Mungojerrie or Rumpelteazer? Or could you have sworn that it might have been both?When you heard a dining room smash or up from the pantry there came a loud crashOr down from the library came a loud pingFrom a vase which was commonly said to be MingThen the family would say: "Now which was which cat?It was Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer and there's nothing at all to be done about that"
