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Jonathan Coulton - Betty And Me Lyrics

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  • I guess I was skeptical when I first met Dr. Martin
  • He said we could build a baby out of DNA
  • And although it was expensive it was legal in the states where it wasn't banned
  • It was Betty who suggested that we skip the parts of me that she can't stand
  • So we made an appointment and Betty went alone
  • They worked out the details and then called me on the phone
  • To say congratulations Dad
  • Now things are getting better for Betty and me
  • We're making us a baby that's just like me only better
  • And Betty says he'll be taller
  • And Betty says he'll be smarter
  • And Betty says that our baby will be better than me
  • Betty was pretty firm about our baby being human
  • I said we should give him wings and nice prehensile tail
  • He could travel with the circus making money, making friends with clowns
  • Betty said that's stupid and for God's sake would you turn that TV down?
  • Now I've seen Betty happy, but she's never been like this
  • She glows like someone's girlfriend in the middle of a kiss
  • And I'm excited too
  • Cause things are getting better for Betty and me
  • We're making us a baby that's just like me only better
  • And Betty says he'll be taller
  • And Betty says he'll be smarter
  • And Betty says that our baby will be better than me
  • And the love inside me thunders like a storm
  • And I hope the tube they keep him in is comfortable and warm
  • I hope the nutritive solution that they're feeding him doesn't make him fat
  • Betty's been spending lots of time out late with Dr. Martin
  • She says that they're working on the baby every night
  • And Dr. Martin brings her presents like new underwear and a bottle of wine
  • I'll just keep on writing checks until the day that baby is mine
  • He might have my mustache or my freckles or my eyes
  • Betty thinks it's better if we keep it a surprise
  • I hope I find out soon
  • Cause things are getting better for Betty and me
  • We're making us a baby that's just like me only better
  • And Betty says he'll be taller
  • And Betty says he'll be smarter
  • And Betty says that our baby will be better than
  • Baby will be better than
  • Baby will be better than me

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