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Killers - Joel, The Lump Of Coal Lyrics

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  • Some time ago, at Santa's place
  • Up in the old North Pole
  • There lived a lump of anthracite
  • Whose parents called him Joel
  • Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
  • Happy as a lump can be
  • He just wants to keep Santa warm
  • And make the elves cozy
  • But Santa Claus had other plans
  • For Joel one fateful day
  • "Joel, you're just the lump I need
  • Come join me on my sleigh”
  • Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
  • Heart leapt up with joy
  • "I'll soon be Santa's present to
  • A lucky girl or boy
  • We'll laugh and play together
  • And hold each other tight
  • Snuggle under clean white sheets
  • When we go to sleep at night”
  • Then Santa's elves all laughed at Joel
  • "You're in for a surprise
  • You're not a special Christmas gift
  • You're just a *****y prize
  • What kid would ever want you?
  • You're filthy as can be
  • Now you have to go and live
  • With one who's been naughty”
  • "But I make heat, ” poor Joel cried
  • "And electricity”
  • "You pollute the air
  • With CO2 and mercury”
  • Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
  • Fell down upon his knees
  • "I don't wanna live with a naughty kid
  • Don't make me, Santa, please”
  • But Santa laughed his jolly laugh
  • "Ho, ho, you stupid lump
  • You're just the thing to teach this brat
  • That Santa ain't no chump”
  • So off they knew and, before he knew
  • Joel was in a sack
  • He cried and yelled to Santa Claus
  • "Why don't we just go back?”
  • And then came Christmas morning
  • And, much to Joel's surprise (Much to Joel's surprise)
  • He saw a boy with the saddest face
  • And tears were in his eyes (Tears were in his eyes)
  • He picked Joel up and held him
  • And said "You can be my friend (Hey man, let's be friends)
  • I would've liked some presents but
  • You're what Santa chose to send (Santa chose to send)
  • It's true, I've been a naughty boy
  • And maybe that's a sin (Maybe that's a sin)
  • If this is how Santa treats the kids
  • I'm just glad that I'm not him”
  • Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
  • Knew what he must do
  • He said "Now I know the reason why
  • I got sent to you
  • Cause when a person hurts inside
  • It turns him hard and cruel
  • But I know how to make your pain
  • Into a precious jewel
  • So take me in your hand, young man
  • And squeeze with all your might
  • Let's turn your pain and anger
  • Into something that shines bright”
  • Then Joel, Joel, the lump of coal
  • He gave his life away
  • So that one good naughty little boy
  • Found a diamond on Christmas day

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