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Allan Sherman - Here's To The Crabgrass Lyrics

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  • Here's To The Crabgrass
  • Here's to the crabgrass,
  • Here's to the mortgage,
  • In fact, here's to Suburbia.
  • Lay down your briefcase,
  • Far from the rat race,
  • Where nothing can disturb ya.
  • Uncomplicated,
  • It's what we waited
  • For so long in this city.
  • Come let us go there,
  • Live like Thoreau there,
  • A life of sweet simplicity.
  • Did you set the thermostat?
  • No, I don't know where it's at.
  • Tuesday the Cub Scouts meet again.
  • Walk the dog and cut the grass,
  • Take the kids to dancing class,
  • Jim's Little League got beat again.
  • Can't keep a maid here,
  • No matter what they're paid here,
  • The place has bad publicity.
  • Why did we move here?
  • Don't you remember?
  • To live in sweet simplicity.
  • Here's to mosquitos,
  • Clam dip and Fritos,
  • To golf and bridge and scuba there.
  • Men wearing knee pants,
  • Women in Capri pants,
  • Discussing what's with Cuba there.
  • Each big appliance
  • Treats you with defiance,
  • Until it finally falls apart.
  • Call the repairman,
  • In a week he's there, man,
  • To knock your kitchen walls apart.
  • Tommy's got a bloody nose,
  • Gotta fix the garden hose.
  • Book Of The Month Club came today.
  • Didn't read the last one yet.
  • Yes you did, but you forget.
  • Oh well, they're all the same today.
  • Here's Mrs. Ritter,
  • She's the baby sitter.
  • Tonight we're going joyously
  • Back to the city,
  • Where life is gay and witty,
  • Back to the noise there,
  • That everyone enjoys there.
  • Back to the crush there,
  • Hurry let us rush there,
  • Back to the rat race,
  • Don't forget your briefcase,
  • Back in the groove there,
  • Say why don't we move there.
  • Away from all of this
  • Sweet simplicity

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