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Andrew Lloyd Webber - Growltiger's Last Stand Lyrics

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  • Growltiger was a Bravo cat who travelled on a barge
  • In face he was the roughest cat that ever roamed at large
  • From Gravesend up to Oxford he pursued his evil aims
  • Rejoicing in his title of the 'Terror of the Thames'
  • His manners and appearance did not calculate to please
  • His coat was torn and seedy, it was baggy at the knees
  • Once ear was somewhat missing, no need to tell you why
  • And he scowled upon a hostile world from one forbidding eye
  • The cottagers of Rotherhithe knew something of his fame
  • At Hammersmith and Putney people shuddered at his name
  • The would fortify the hen house, lock up the silly goose
  • When the rumor ran along the shore: Growltiger's on the loose!
  • Woe to the weak canary that fluttered from its cage
  • Woe to the pampered Pekeinese, that face Growltiger's rage
  • Woe to the bristly bandicoot, that lurks on foreign ships
  • And woe to any cat with whom Growltiger came to grips
  • But most to cats of foreign race his hatred had been vowed
  • To cats of foreign name and race no quarter was allowed
  • The Persian and the Siamese regarded him with fear
  • Because it was a Siamese had mauled his missing ear
  • Now on a peaceful summer night all nature seemed at play
  • The tender Moon was shining bright, the barge at Molsey lay
  • All in the balmy moonlight it lay rocking on the tide
  • And Growltiger was disposed to show his sentimental side
  • In the forepeak of the vessel Growltiger stood alone
  • Concentrating my attention on the Lady Griddlebone
  • And my raffish crew were sleeping in their barrels and their bunks
  • As the Siamese came creeping in their sampans and their junks
  • Growltiger had no eye or ear for aught but Griddlebone
  • And the lady seemed enraptured by my manly baritone
  • Disposed to relaxation and awaiting no surprise
  • But the moonlight sone reflected from a thousand bright blue eyes
  • And closer still and closer the sampans circled 'round
  • And yet from all the enemy there was not heard a soun
  • The foe was armed with toasting forks and cruel carving knives
  • And the lovers sang their last duet in danger of their lives
  • Then Genghis gave the signal to his fierce Monglian hordes
  • Abandoning their sampans, the Chinks they swarmed aboard
  • Abandoning their sampans, the pullaways, their junks
  • They battened down the hatches on the crew within their bunks
  • Then Griddlebone she gave a screech for she was badly skeered
  • I am sorry to admit it, but she quickly disappeared
  • She probably escaped with ease, I'm sure she was not drowned
  • But a serried ring of flashing steel Growltiger did surround
  • The ruthless foe pressed forward in subborn rank on rank
  • Growltiger to his vast surprise was forced to walk the plank
  • He who a hundered victims had driven to that drop
  • At the end of all his crimes was forced to go kerflip, kerflop
  • Oh there was joy in Wapping when the news flew through the land
  • At Maidenhead and Henley there was dancing on the strand
  • Rats were roasted whole in Brentford and Victoria Dock
  • And a day of celebration was commanded in Bangkok!
  • These modern productions are all very well
  • But there's nothing to equal from what I hear tell
  • That moment of mystery when I made history

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