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Andrew Lloyd Webber - The Naming Of Cats Lyrics

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  • The naming of cats is a difficult matter
  • It isn't just one of your holiday games
  • You may think at first I'm mad as a hatter
  • When I tell you a cat must have three different names
  • First of all, there's the name that the family use daily
  • Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo or James
  • Such as Victor or Jonathan, George or Bill Bailey
  • All of them are sensible, everyday names
  • But I tell you a cat needs a name that's particular
  • A name that's peculiar and more dignified
  • Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular?
  • Or spread out his whiskers or cherish his pride?
  • Of names of this kind, I can give you a quorum
  • Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo or Coricopat
  • Such as Bombalurina, or else Jellylorum
  • Names that never belong to more than one cat
  • But above and beyond there's still one name left over
  • And that is the name that you will never guess
  • The name that no human research can discover
  • But the cat himself knows and will never confess
  • When you notice a cat in profound meditation
  • The reason, I tell you, is always the same
  • His mind is engaged in rapt contemplation
  • Of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name
  • His ineffable, effable, effanineffable
  • Deep and inscrutable singular name
  • Name, name, name, name, name, name

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