Half Man Half Biscuit - Letters Sent Lyrics
Keeper you’ve just made a decent saveSo why d’you feel the need to rant and raveScreaming at defendersMakes you look dead stupidEspecially when they haven’t done much wrongPlease cease the traitThank you to whoever found my purseAlso when I fell, the passing nurseAnd when in my comaAs I tried to bludgeonChartist demonstrators in the squareThose on the wardYours, much restoredI disagree entirely with your choicePeetie Wheatstraw had a better voiceI’d like to warn your readersStapeley Water GardensA nice day out but best to take a flaskDear Miss McVeyIt pains me to sayThe school choir was dullAnd the blame lies with youSewage farm an absolute disgracePicnic table somewhat out of placeLeisure centre cashpointAlways out of orderAnd there’s too much chlorine in the poolThirteen acrossWhere was the clue?Bird on the wireLen, you’re the dogs’