Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Billericay Dickie Lyrics
(spoken)good evening i'm from Essexin case you couldn't tellmy given name is Dickie, I come from Billericayand I'm doing very wellhad a love affair with Ninain the back of my Cortinaa seasoned up hyena could not have been more obscenershe took me to the cleanersand other misdemeanoursbut I got right up between herrum and her Ribenawell, you ask Joyce and Vickiif candy-floss is stickyI'm not a blinking thickyI'm Billericay Dickieand i'm doing very wellI bought a lot of brandywhen I was courting Sandytook eight to make her randyand all I had was shandyanother thing with Sandywhat often came in handywas passing her a 'Mandy'she didn't half go bandyso you ask Joyce and Vickiif I ever took the mickeyI'm not a flipping thickyI'm Billericay Dickieand I'm doing very wellI'd rendezvous with Janetquite near the Isle of Thanetshe looked more like a gannetshe wasn't half a prannether mother tried to ban ither father helped me plan itand when I captured Janet she bruised her pomegranetso you ask Joyce and Vickiif i ever shaped up trickyI'm not a blooming thickyI'm Billericay Dickieand I'm doing very wellyou should never hold a candle if you don't know where it's beenthe jackpot is in the handle on a normal fruit machineso you ask Joyce and Vickiwho's their favourite brickieI'm not a common thickyI'm Billericay Dickieand I'm doing very wellI know a lovely old toe-rag obliging and noblessekindly, charming shag from Shoeburynessmy given name is DickieI come from BillericayI thought you'd never guessso you ask Joyce and Vickia pair of squeaky chickiesI'm not a flaming thicky I'm Billericay Dickieand I'm doing very welloh golly, oh gosh come and lie on the couchwith a nice bit of posh from Burnham-on-Crouchmy given name is Dickie, I come from Billericayand I ain't a sloutchso you ask Joyce and Vickiabout Billericay DickieI ain't an effin' thickyyou ask Joyce and Vickiand I'm doing very well
