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Song title: LL Cool J - Clap Your Hands

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[ll cool j]
Yeah..
Yeah I like that guitar man, yeah
Yo e-love I like the way you flipped that guitar man
Knahmsayin?  it was a good idea man, knahmsayin?  yeah
Its kinda like freakin me, yaknahmsayin?
I wanna get hype man, I wanna do this, yaknahmsayin?
Just gon chill, check it out

Slick as vasoline, smell good as cologne
Im like a muscle man in jail -- they leave me alone
I rhyme like superman, you rap like jimmy olson
I break you like a bottle of green golden molson
You aint a real rhymer, you look like a actress
How you gon sleep on me holmes, do I look like a mattress?
Am I that old, do I walk like grady?
Ima hundred-fifty proof, smirnoff is only 80
Dont you ever try to rock my house
Im a real cool cat, know what Im sayin mickey mouse?
The poetry specialist, so take a dose of this
Now think about it -- can you really come close to this?
You soft as powder, weak as a cabin cooler
Ugly as work shoes, messin with the ruler:
The ultimate writer reciter and def entertainer
I work myself harder than a boxers trainer

Chorus: ll cool j

Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
I said, clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)

[ll cool j]
You end up, underneath my sneaker
Youre dog doo-doo, Im watchin you get weaker
You cant believe, the skill and dexterity
Ll cool j, and the j is for jeremy
So buff me, james todd the earthquaker
Thats right my brother, youre goin out like sega
{*censored*} chewed, so whassup dude?
One of my battlesll get your girlies in the mood
Sucker mcs really make me sick
Im so bad, I can suck my own {dick}
If you go to your girls house and Im there already
Dont go crazy cause my name aint eddie
Rhymes so rough, its like a course in trigonometry
When einstein was talkin, he was talkin bout me
The prince of the earth, and ima give birth
To a rhyme so hard you look soft as a smurf
Gigglin and wigglin, so how we goin out?
Lovely, and thats without a doubt!

Chorus 3/4x

[ll cool j]
Rappers are my servants, they serve me like an emperor
When Im through, youll need a nurse to take your temperature
And cool you down, cause youre cold as leftovers
Not the ones on the table, Im talkin about ruff rovers
You cant get over -- whats my name, goofy?
You smoke Im no joke, so my brother break out the looseys
And take a pull, cause the buck stops here
I get swift as a magician, wreck {shit} and dissapear
Dont cross me, or lose your loyalty
To the prince of the rap court, Im royalty
And it aint no puzzle, its a shame how rappers guzzle
Paragraphs I put together so I carry a muzzle
To shut em up and cut em up and make em be quiet
Im a one man riot, so dont even try it
The prince of special tactics, plus Im athletic
Before you play your hand you better do some calisthetics
Jumpin jacks, squats, push-ups, the whole nine
Speak your piece, then ima go for mine
And I guarantee you, Im gonna strike again
I recommend my friend you drop the pen and give in
Cop out to one rhyme cause youre facin ten
I aint sidney poitier but we can do this again
Im nice wit mines, and I gotta admit it
You dont really wanna battle, why dontcha just forget it!

Chorus 1/2

[ll cool j]
But if youre hard headed and you still dont understand
Heres a little sample -- ehm ehm, my man

*brrrrrrring* hello?
{*cut n scratch cool j*}
.. takes everything youve got -> cheers (theme song)
{*cut n scratch pushin a broom*}
.. sure would help a lot -> cheers (theme song)

[ll cool j]
Check my stats, how we livin, I thought so
Im fresh, oh yes, but can they flow, hell no
My rhymes are up to date, excellent, on point
Im tellin you, theyre the serious joint
I eat my steak fast, I drink my brew slow
My voice is milky with a nice clear flow
I eat like a fat man, and walk like a gigolo
Im not a ballplayer, so now yknow!

Clap your hands everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)
Cause I rock the house, everybody (aiyyo)
And everybody just clap your hands (aiyyo)

Knowhatimsayin?  and ima be straight til the year 3000
Thats word to mother, knahmsayin?
And I say mother with a v cause the v is for victory yaknahmsayin?
Cause Im the victor in this game, word up
Knahmsayin?  thats what time it is, peace

{*crew applause*}

That man, he sure is funky funky funky
Funky! funky, he sho is!
You best believe hes funky!
You didnt know? ? ?  funky!