Dodger - Guild Ho! Lyrics
I saw a lovely darkened elfWith hair as sleek as ebonyHer armor seemed to betrayThe forces of our gravityI told her that I'd like to mountBut mounting me would be a treatI stamped and sworeThe sword she woreWas not intended for deceitGuild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!No sum of gold could buy a better lifeAll else is misery!Guild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!So grab a beerAnd flex your pecsIt's time for us to march!I tripped upon a curvy gnomeWhose cheek was all be-specklyKnee-high to meI could forseeA problem all quite vividlyShe stood in shock as I explainedPositions that would work for usShe roared and railedCut off my tailAnd left my bod in maimednessGuild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!No sum of gold could buy a better lifeAll else is miseryGuild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!So flex your pecsAnd brush your tusksIt's time for us to march!I nearly killed a human lassOf whom I found most dull and boreHer hair and nails did quite entailThe life of a barstander's whoreI cast her off and rolled my eyesIt's hardly worth an easy killIt wasn't less than seconds leftBefore I took myself a spillDear listener, it's good to knowDon't judge the cover of a bookMy heart was won for her that dayAfter the beating that I took!Guild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!No sum of gold could buy a better lifeAll else is miseryGuild Ho!Guild Ho!Horde ho to victory!So brush your tusksAnd grab a beerIt's time for us to march!So brush your tusksAnd grab a beerIt's time for us to march!So flex your pecsAnd brush your tusksIt's time for us to march, march, march, march(March, march, march)
