Stephen Lynch - Half A Man Lyrics
All my daysI live with my disgraceIm afraid to show my faceOr at least take off my underwearSee I was bornLike a half way neutered petI dont have a matching setIts a part of meThat just aint therePlease, dont stareWell Im a gambling man with out two diceIm like Uncle Ben with only one grain of riceOh to have two testis would be so niceBut Im half a manYeah, Im half a manWanna dieend it all, just call it quitsI cant find a cup that fitsAnd at baseball games I feel so dumbWhen I hear ball one?Oh, my GodHow could you have been so cruelTo give me one family jewelAnd the one thats there must feel so sadHes a lonely manWell Im a marathon runner with just one legIm a fallopian tube with just one eggOh, I want another testiDo I have to beg?Im half a manWell Im a tweedle dee with no tweedle dumAnd Im a Siskel and an Ebert with just one thumbAnd Im a Yo Ho Ho with no bottle of rumIm just half a manYeah, Im half a man
