Adam Sandler - Toll Booth Willie Lyrics
Performed by adam sandler, rob schneider, tim meadows, david spade, steve koren, tim herlihy, and margaret ruden[car approaches]Toll booth willie: welcome to worchester. dollar twenty-five please.M1: hey, how ya doin toll booth willie?Toll booth willie: good! thanks fer askin, pop!M1: aww, thats great, you know, considering yer a *****in idiot![pays toll and drives off]Toll booth willie: go ***** yourself you son of a *****! Ill come right outta the booth and *****in whack ya, you *****in prick![another car approaches]M2: hey, hey, willie! hows it going?Toll booth willie: hey, cant complain, pop. hows bout you?M2: oh, great, great. how much?Toll booth willie: the state charges a dollar twenty-five, pop.M2: thats fine. now should I give you the money, or should I shove the quarters directly up your fat ass!?[pays toll and drives off]Toll booth willie: why you *****in hard on! Ill *****ing carlton fisk yer *****in head with a louise-ville *****in slugger! whadya think of that ass *****!?[another car approaches]F1: hi willie.Toll booth willie: oh, nice to see ya mam. not a bad day, huh?F1: well, Im a little lost. could you help me out? I hear your the best with directions.Toll booth willie: well I know my way around new england. I can tell ya that much. so where ya headed?F1: well, I was just wondering exactly which is the best way to drive up your ass. you know, if youd tell me, Id appreciate it, you *****in prick.[drives off]Toll booth willie: you *****in *****! ***** you! you forgot to pay the *****in toll you dirty whore! Ill *****in drop you with a boot to the *****in skull you cum guzzling queen![another car approaches]M3: hey willie.Toll booth willie: hey, how are ya?M3: heres a dollar twenty-five, and go ***** yourself.[pays toll and drives off]Toll booth willie: dah, you *****in prick! I hope you choke on a *****in bottle cap, ya *****in son of a *****! eat shit! eat my shit![another car approaches]Bishop nelson: hello willie. good to see you.Toll booth willie: ahhh, bishop nelson. nice to see ya. that was quite a sermon you had the other day.Bishop nelson: hey, well I do my best.Toll booth willie: dollar twenty-five, bishop.Bishop nelson: dollar twenty-five, willie. isnt that the same price your mother charges for a blow job, you piece of dog shit!?[pays toll and drives off]Toll booth willie: ohhh! have another one, you *****in lush! its not my fault the bartender cut ya off last night ya *****in douche bag![another car approaches]M5: hey!Toll booth willie: well hey!M5: yeah, do you want the money, or should I just shove the quarters directly up your fat ass!?[pays toll and drives off]Toll booth willie: well, I already heard that one you *****in unoriginal bastard! go suck a corn you *****in piece of repeatin shit![another car approaches]F2: hi.Toll booth willie: oh, hi. how are ya?F2: fine, thank you. how much is the toll please?Toll booth willie: for you sweetheart, its a dollar twenty-five.F2: here ya go.[pays toll]F2: thank you.[begins to drive off]Toll booth willie: hey! hey! honey! would you like a receipt with that?F2: oh, I almost forgot. thank you so much.[toll booth willie scribbling a receipt for her]Toll booth willie: and here ya are.F2: umm, do you think you could sign it?Toll booth willie: oh, uh.. sign it?F2: yeah, sign toll booth willie was here.Toll booth willie: ok, sure. uhh, by the way, what is this for?[signing receipt]F2: just so I could have proof for my friends that I met the biggest *****in dip shit with the smallest dick alive. you understand.[drives off][crumples up paper]Toll booth willie: ***** you, you *****in upity *****! Ill *****in ***** you and all your lesbian fish-eating friends in front of your *****in mothers! youre gonna die, *****! Im comin oThe booth! [opens the door and runs out of the booth][car screeches and hits him]Toll booth willie: ooooh! my *****in leg!M6: hey! you ran over toll booth willie!M7: oh my god! I was always wondering what it would be like to run over aDried up stinky dick licker.Toll booth willie: why you *****in pricks. I *****in hear every *****in word yer saying! when this *****in leg heals, Im gonna kick you guys new *****in *****s![everyone cussing eachother out]
