Adam Kay - Mr Burton Lyrics
Here’s my long caseBehind the curtain.It’s Mr Burton.He’s 64.He has chest pain,Crushing in nature.It radiates toHis arm and jaw.This pains been getting worse since Wednesday(A-o-ah)And GTN spray(A-ah)Has helped a bit.He does not know what is the cause here.(A-o-ah)And he’s had nausea(A-ah)Along with it.He’s had no illnesses of note,Except for polyps in his throat,He’s on no medication and he’s got no allergies.He has no relevant family history(A-o-ah)Except a sister he(A-ah)Thinks had a stroke.He lives alone.He’s an accountant.(A-o-ah)He drinks small amounts and(A-ah)He doesn’t smoke.The student doesn’t realiseThat what I told him was all lies,But when the doctor asks me questionsI will tell the truth.You said I’m onNo medication.(A-o-ah)That information(A-ah)Is not quite true.I take three typesOf diarrhoetic.(A-o-ah)I’m diabetic,(A-ah)Epileptic too.I’ve got one lung,I’ve got a stoma,(A-o-ah)Hodgkins Lymphoma,(A-ah)Hepatitis B,There’s my MS,There’s my anaemia,(A-o-ah)And my leukaemia,(A-ah)And my HIV.You stupid cunt!You lying cunt!You stupid lying *****ing cunt!You lied to me you stupid sweaty ugly *****ing cunt!I’ve had a sexChange, I’ve got haemorrhoids,(A-o-ah)I’m taking steroids,(A-ah)Oral and inhaled,I cannot see,I’ve got paralysis,(A-o-ah)I’m on dialysis,(Uh-oh)And I think you failed.
